Lessons Before the License

“What happened to your mom’s legs?” Brayden leaned over and whispered to me.

Memorial Day weekend we always have a big cookout for the unofficial start of summer. Family and friends fill our backyard. The smell of the grill, music playing, sunshine and the occasional squirt from a water gun. 

I looked over to my mom. She wasn’t at the grill; she was holding my little cousin, flipping her upside down and back up again. My mom is good with games like that.

“She has a metal rod in one leg and pins from a car accident,” I told him.

“Really? What happened? Looks like it hurts.”

“She was in a bad car accident, hit by a drunk driver.”

Brayden just scheduled his driver’s test, and I knew he was nervous. Before I ever opened the Pennsylvania Driver’s Manual or took a driver's ed class, I had already learned my first lesson about driving. One person’s decision behind the wheel can affect many people for the rest of their lives.

My mom walked over to us.

“How are you boys doing? Anyone want another hot dog or hamburger?”

“In a bit,” I said.

“I’m good, thanks,” Brayden answered. “Mrs. Franek, Luke said you have a metal rod in your leg because of a car accident. What happened?”

“I do,” my mom said. “My femur broke so badly that the bone was sticking out of my leg! The doctors couldn’t put it in a cast, so they had to put in a rod and fix me back up.”

“Wow.’ Brayden took it in.

“She’s kind of  bionic,” I said to break the moment.

“But I don’t beep at airports!” she laughed.

That is how my mom usually talks about the accident now. She makes jokes and keeps moving. You would never know she spent two months in the hospital and needed a blood transfusion. It took her a year to learn how to walk again because her pelvis was also shattered. She went from a wheelchair to a walker to crutches to a cane.  She even had to have another surgery on her leg. She did a lot of physical therapy to get better. She still exercises and walks every day though. She says she appreciates the ability more having lost it.

“Were you wearing a seat belt?” Brayden asked.

“Yes,” she said. “And it probably saved my life!” She slapped Brayden on the shoulder “ I’ll  go put on some more hot dogs.”

Another person in the car was not wearing a seat belt and was thrown from the vehicle. He suffered serious injuries.

“What happened to the drunk driver?” Brayden asked me after my mom walked back toward the grill.

“He ran a stop sign, hit my mom’s car and fled,” I said. “The police had to chase him down. He was not even old enough to drink legally.”

“Bad decision after bad decision,” Brayden said.

That's it. The crash wasn’t just caused by one mistake. The driver chose to drink. He chose to drive. He ignored a stop sign. Then he chose to leave the scene. Driver education is important because it teaches people to recognize dangerous choices before those choices become a spiraling chain of consequences.

Learning to actually drive a car is only one aspect of being on the road. A person also has to understand a zillion other things like reaction time, stopping distance, road conditions, distractions, blind spots, and don't forget about the weather. If drivers are educated, they can practice those good habits like second nature before they even get on the road. They can get ahead of the game.

An orange and black remote-control car crashed into my ankle. “Hey, watch where you’re going with that thing,” I yelled to my younger cousin. “Speaking of bad driving.”

Brayden laughed. “At least he can pick it up and just reset it.”

Wish it were that easy in real life. Reducing deaths on the road requires more than telling people to “Watch where they're going.” Driver education shouldn't end with a multiple-choice test. The best lessons come from real life. I've learned just as much from watching my mom recover as I ever will from reading a driver's manual.  Safe driving is a habit that has to be practiced every day. 

“I don’t think I could live with myself if I did that to somebody,” Brayden said, looking toward my mom.

“Right?” I answered. “It isn’t only about getting a ticket or losing your license. You could kill someone, hurt their family and yours.”

It’s not just about you on the road, but it is about you. We all can do little things for our trip like setting up our music before we drive and putting our phones on silent.

My mom returned with my hot dog.

“So B, when is your test?” she asked.

“After the holiday. I couldn’t get an earlier appointment.”

“You’ll do great,” she told him. “Focus. Make good decisions-” 
“Wear your seatbelt,” I interrupted. My mom was kind of lecturing. Or just being a mom. She’s a teacher, too, so she always puts lessons out there.

“Yes, you know, we’re lucky. Seatbelts save lives!” My mom jumped at him. “Back in my day- no, I’m just kidding, but there used to be no seatbelts in cars. Just follow the rules. Simple. And watch out for black ice!”

“Mom,” I said.

She noticed my eye-roll. “It could be 75 degrees here today, and tomorrow, it could be 20. You never know in Northeast PA” she said. 

Yes, I guess you never know. You never know about anything and always have to be prepared and play by the rules. Rules matter, but drivers must choose to follow them. Looking at my mom and other people like her, you think all of it could be avoided if everyone just played the game the right way. 

Driver education can’t take back what happened to my mom, but it can help prevent another family from going through the same experience. Just because you pass your driver’s test doesn’t mean you’re done with learning about driving.

"Hey there, racecar!" my mom laughed as the orange-and-black remote-control car zipped past her feet. "I've already got one bad leg. I don't need another one."

Everyone laughed. Then my little cousin picked up the orange and black car, turned it around and started driving again. 

I wish recovering from a real crash were that easy