The Cost of Not Being Afraid

 I was in a crash. I didn’t get hurt. I wasn’t scared. Why? I grew up in Vietnam; a country of busy streets filled with motorcycles and no cars at sight. It wasn’t uncommon that there were accidents, since everyone just went straight ahead with little to no caution for others on the road. I was on the same boat. I didn’t care how my family drove, I just trusted them to care enough about others to drive safely. 

It wasn’t until I got to America that I learned the difference between the two countries’ driving. There weren’t as many motorcycles, the roads weren’t as packed, and people actually followed road safety.  

Looking back at it now, that’s what was most unsettling to me once I learned it. I wasn’t calm during the crash because of something idealistic like “I was brave”, it was because I was never taught the true consequences of not driving safely. Growing up within that kind of environment for many years made it a lot harder for me to develop a fear of how scary not driving safe really was. Coming to the US changed my perception of what it means to be a driver. I watched people stop at red lights even if there was no one on the crosswalk. I watched people wait patiently for pedestrians to cross. I watched them follow speed limits and actually slow down when it mattered. It didn’t seem real at first, I thought people were doing too much, but driving WAS meant to be this safe. 

The contrast made me pay a little more attention to the numbers, and it turned out that this environment where I thought was perfectly safe was far more dangerous than anything I’ve ever seen. Why was it that in such a safely designed system that we still had 34,000 people die yearly from driving accidents? It didn’t make sense, considering that my country, with its chaotic roads, and the US with much better infrastructure were both dangerous. I had to acknowledge the fact that the safe driving isn’t specific to one country or another, it more so lies in the education level of the driver themselves. 

That’s the difference between the two versions of myself, one that walked away from a crash in Vietnam with no fear, and the one that’s typing this essay now with the knowledge of what it means to be on the road. I have to thank driver’s ed for showing me that safety is a result of a decision that comes from before, during, and after you’re on the road. It showed me that every choice, from checking mirrors to slowing down at an intersection or pulling out your phone can cost consequences that can never be changed. People shouldn’t be driving carefully to only avoid getting caught, but rather they should always be driving carefully to avoid becoming an addition to the count or making someone else one. 

When I started to learn to drive here myself, I noticed how differently I approached it compared to how I was in the passenger seat. I found myself slowing down at intersections even when no one was around, as a reminder that there are those out there that unfortunately got hurt or lost a life because someone wasn’t paying attention. I also had to start thinking of driving less as something that only affects me, but also other people around me, and even those that I can’t see.  

If I had a message to share with other new drivers, I’d want them to truly understand the physical and mental consequences that they have over their own lives and other people’s lives. Given the chance, I think everyone should take driver’s ed because the reality of driving is a lot different than the expectations that people may have about it. It has taught me to become a better driver, one that can stay focused and refuse to pull the phone out to avoid distractions. No matter my situation, it’s helped me able to realize that my decisions and my ability to make those decisions can be fatal to me and others. 

The more I drive, the less I take the crash for granted. Just because I lucked out one time, it doesn’t mean that the next one will be the same. Safety shouldn’t be taken for granted, it should be a result of the choices you make. I think about how many people have had a version of my story: an accident, a little scare, and moved on with their day, not evaluating how they drove. Nothing about this pattern will change and only break when someone truly decides that just because nothing happened this time, it doesn’t mean that it never will.