Learning the Hard Way: A Personal Reflection on Accidents and Education

I got into my first car accident on September 29^th of 2022 in Manchester NH. I was 18 and had been driving for almost three years. The other driver’s name was Lesley, and I think she was late for work. She got my number and left. And that was the end of it. It was just a fender bender. I had tapped her SUV. There wasn’t even a scratch on my Honda Civic.

I wasn’t even late for class. But I spent the rest of the day teary-eyed. I knew that some new horrible milestone had just been reached. I was just in my first ever fender bender. On the drive to class after I hit Lesley, I flinched every time a car got too close to me. Through the haze of tears, it was a wonder I didn’t hit someone again. It was terrifying, getting back behind the wheel after failing as a driver. I felt deeply ashamed.

I loved that Honda Civic. It was a 2017, and my first big purchase. It had close to 9k miles when I bought it and was in great condition. That car was a part of me. It took me to my first job, my high school graduation, and my first college class. It was also the first car I totaled. But this time, it was plain bad luck.

In late December of 2022, we had the first snowstorm of the season. And let me tell you, mother nature does not play games in New Hampshire. I didn’t want to leave the house. For years, I’ve suffered from anxiety- especially in the car. It was dark, and the snow was coming down fast. My mom told me I’d be fine, and to go- my boyfriend, James, really wanted Doritos.

In a way, the snow was beautiful. It was silent and glowed under the headlights of my Civic. We must have been going 20 miles an hour on our way back, half a mile from my house. A plow passed us on the other side of the road. I remember looking at the plow, so bright in the darkness. As I looked ahead again, my eyes adjusted, and there it was.

I watched the tree fall, saw its branches shake and snap. “Brake!” I whispered and grabbed my boyfriends’ arm. His voice had an edge of panic. “I am.”

When we hit the tree, time seemed to slow down and speed up at the same time. I remember everything, but it happened so quickly. The windshield crunched. I was thrown against my seatbelt and hit my head on the side of the car to my right. Then we slid to the right, down and down, and I was hanging sideways and up wasn’t where it should be anymore.

The windshield wipers were twitching over the crumpled ruin of the windshield. Later, I would poke it with a screwdriver and see the whole thing flex and creak. It had barely held. Small pieces of glass had flown everywhere. James had a cut on his hairline. Somehow, he got the door open- it was above him now. The seatbelt took a little aggression to unclip. I put my foot on my passenger side door and hooked my hand around the center consol. I climbed up my car, grabbing the steering wheel. Glass buried itself in my hand when I propped my weight on the dashboard. James helped me out of the car, since at this point, I was rock climbing. I could feel the car shift beneath me and was terrified it would roll over with me trapped inside. Or blow up. I don’t know a lot about cars. I mean, the airbags hadn’t even gone off.

We stood back and looked at the ruin of my beloved Honda Civic.

My boyfriend had jerked the wheel right, hitting the trunk instead of the branches and probably saving us a lot of hurt, if not our lives. The momentum of the slick snow under our tires carried us through the tree, forcing it up onto the roof. The car slid out from under the tree and off the side of the road. The Civic landed on its right side in a gulley, nose down and trunk in the air. The right wheels were buried in snow, and the back left wheel was six feet in the air. The glow of the taillights in the silence made me shiver.

I don’t think we ever ate the Doritos.

Driver’s Education isn’t just about getting your license. It’s about becoming an aware driver. It’s about becoming a defensive driver. That’s one thing I learned from my dad, who has raced cars my whole life. It doesn’t matter if you’re a good driver. It’s the other drivers and being aware of your surroundings that you must worry about. I consider myself a good driver, but I wasn’t aware enough. I learned that with Lesley, and again after that hated tree.

I should have listened to my gut that night. I should have been responsible and aware. But I wasn’t. Driver’s Ed can teach you about responsible decision making behind the wheel and increase your awareness about road hazards. Just because you have snow tires, or 4-wheel drive, doesn’t mean you’re invincible. Learning to anticipate potential hazards on the road can be the difference between life and death. The thing is, I didn’t learn that when I took the course as a 16-year-old. I learned about how fast you can go over the speed limit before you get pulled over. I learned about why State Park signs are brown. And sure, I learned to read road signs and follow right-of-way. I passed my test first try. But I didn’t learn the skills I needed most.

More than anything, we need comprehensive, affordable, driver’s education. I know so many young adults who can’t afford it, so they wait until they’re 18 and get their license without a single class. Depending on the classes you take, Driver’s Ed can cost up to $1,000. According to NH DOT, 118 drivers have died this year- and the snow hasn’t even started falling yet. Driving is dangerous. But it doesn’t have to be. If Driver’s Education is made more accessible, other young drivers like me won’t have to learn the hard way.

Driver’s Education is a cornerstone of shaping new drivers into focused, responsible ones. If we utilize this tool correctly, we can reduce motor vehicle accidents and increase the safety of our roads. By equipping individuals, especially young adults, with the knowledge, skills, and mindset of a defensive driver, these programs could significantly contribute to reducing roadway fatalities.