The Drivers of America

There is a reason why I am the only person to drive when anyone offers to hang out. Even though I have never had the experience of being in a car crash, there have been several close calls, things I have been involved in or witnessed that have completely changed my view on safe driving.

I think my fear of being in the passenger seat derives from my mother, as she has a severe fear of letting other people drive. Throughout my life, my mother has always driven us anywhere, whether it be for 8 hours straight across three different states to move me into college, or just driving my brother and I a few miles away to school. I could never understand why she would always be so adamant about driving, even if it was a late drive home from the beach where we were all exhausted. But as I got older, more things came to light about her fear of being in the passenger seat, to which I have experienced some of those same things. She grew up with an alcoholic father, one who would drink and drive, with no care of who else was in the car with him, ultimately providing severe trauma for my mom that still affects her to this day.

When I started learning how to drive, I was so excited. I wanted to get my driver’s license the day I turned 16, as it was a way of being independent in my life and legally. Driving with my dad always went smoothly. He was always calm and collected, and would never scare me if I was making a mistake, but would teach me how to be better for the next time. Driving with my mom was a little different. As time went on, I would realize that my hands would become tighter on the wheel, my hands would begin to sweat, and my breathing would become shallow. I was terrified of making my mom feel unsafe, as she was already anxious just being in the passenger seat. With that heightened anxiety, led to more mistakes. I remember one prime example of this, being merging onto the I-80 freeway for the first time on one of the busiest on-ramps in Sacramento. My senses were already heightened, as this was all new and scary from 15-year-old me, and I wasn’t looking fast enough behind and in front of me to merge between the two bumper to bumper cars, almost ramming into the butt of the car in front of me, resulting in my mom yelling at me to stop.

When I was finally able to drive on my own, my mother entrusted me with being a safe driver, and hoping I would take the role of being the designated driver, as you never feel any safer than having that control of being behind the wheel. I realized this when I would carpool with some of my friends to different places such as the lake, or even just a lunch date at Chipotle. Different friends had different driving techniques. One of my friends held her phone right next to her steering wheel, completely unfazed by whatever was happening in front of her, sending snapchats to her boyfriend or texting her mom back. Another friend’s seatbelts didn’t work, meaning if there was a crash, I’d most likely go through the window.

When I started the dating scheme, I believed in the old tradition of the man driving the woman. I only let this aspect come to life if I knew the person and trusted them, which I found could be wrong at times. In the summer of 2022, I went out on a date with someone who I had known for years, and at the time thought I had trusted. In the beginning, his driving was safe. Until we got behind the gates of the lake on those small, 15 mile per hour roads that were windy and could be extremely dangerous if taking a curve too fast. He began to ride other people’s bumpers in front of us, even passing them illegally to make sure he could keep going faster, ultimately reaching 60 miles per hour at one point in time on that drive. If I would ask him to slow down, he would just step on the gas. As we began to get off road, there were more bumps in the sand, rocks that would randomly appear, and an unsafe slant to be going the speed we were, resulting in us hitting a bump and my body rising to have my head smash into the car roof above us.

I believe the majority of driving accidents deal with forgetting the consequences of what distracted driving can be, as well as a build up of little things. Almost like an airplane. Most of the time, it’s not one big thing that causes the plane to go down, rather it’s a multitude of things. Maybe it’s the connection of being tired, running low on gas, and then going to check the one text that could have waited until the end of the destination. Sometimes it’s not just the idea of someone checking their phone and then ending up in a deadly crash.

I think that teenagers of today’s times don’t understand the repercussions of not driving safely, as many kids I know didn’t truly pay attention to the driver’s ed they did when they turned 15. I think a way to fix the issue of getting teens and young adults to stop driving so recklessly is not being afraid to call them out. If it is not making you comfortable, you should be able to speak up. I also think we should have a constant reminder of how dangerous driving can be, especially if you make the effort to not drive safely. Because so many of us take driving for granted and usually forget how dangerous it can be. Being able to remind yourself that recklessly driving your vehicle could lead to someone losing their life can really help put into perspective how careful you should really be, especially if you’ve heard a family member of a victim talk about how it’s affected their life after the car crash.

Driving is not a right, it is a privilege. So put the phone away for the drive, keep both hands steadily on the wheel, prepare your music channel before you pull out of the driveway, check your gas tank, and keep your eyes focused on the road. And most importantly,

Don’t forget to put your seatbelt on.