Know Your Driver

It was so jarring when I turned to my left in my friend’s car, seeing her on their phone as I sat strapped into the passenger seat. I found myself bracing for impact in that moment as her eyes trailed down to type, her car barrelling towards the one in front.

“It’s just a quick text,” she told me as she went 70 on freeway without looking. In the moments where she wasn’t texting, she pushed 85, 90, 100. Whatever she could get away with. Then, she continued with an excuse: “and it’s really important. It’s my mom, and she’ll kill me if I don’t text back.”

The next thing I know, she was slamming on the breaks, grimacing as she nearly rear ended the car in front. If it wasn’t for the other driver speeding up, we would’ve gotten into a serious accident. This was all after she promised that she would drive particularly safely, as she knew I was anxious in the car, and I had to stop to think- if this is her driving safe, then how did she drive alone?

Unfortunately, I’ve been in this experience with more than just her. Nearly half of the friends I used to get into the car with would drive in a similar style. A recent quote from a different friend stuck out to me in particular, uttered after we nearly got into a head on collision due to them speeding down a winding road. “I drive like a maniac, but it’s okay because I stay calm in bad situations. I know how to handle myself.”

Almost every time a ‘maniac driver’ friend of mine narrowly avoids a collision, it was because the driver they nearly hit took defensive action, yet they still decide to take the credit for being ‘a good driver.’ Then, they continue to tailgate, brake check, speed, and fully exhibit their road rage each time they get into their car, even if they have passengers. It’s even more disturbing when they reveal that they are intoxicated midway through the drive.

“I drive high all the time,” the majority of my friends spout. “It’s okay because I’m experienced. I promise you I know what I’m doing.” Most of them haven’t even had their license for more than a year. None of them can so much as reverse park, yet they feel completely justified putting other people in danger due to their behaviors. They race around corners, not realizing that somebody could be crossing the street or working in the road. They weave through other cars, hatefully screaming at the top of their lungs because the person in front of them is going the speed limit. They tell me drunk driving stories as funny anecdotes, laughing about all of the times that they almost died. Then, they question why I won’t get in their car with them anymore, shifting the blame onto how I’m a jerk for not putting my life at risk. If their unsafe driving ever got somebody killed, I’m sure that they would blame the person that died, feigning innocence above all else.

As much as I’ve tried to influence the behaviors of my friends who drive recklessly by urging them to slow down for once, none of them have ever been responsive. Many were enrolled in proper driving classes as well, but they only drove safely until they passed the driver’s test. After that, the rules were completely abandoned as they got caught up in the new freedoms that they were suddenly afforded.

The best action that I’ve learned to take is to drive myself everywhere, as I am the only one I can trust to drive how I see fit. If my friends are intoxicated, I’ll be their designated driver to ensure their safety. Under no circumstances will I allow my peers to drive under the influence, and if they insist on it, I will refuse to get into their car and offer to call an Uber or Lyft instead. Of course, these transportation apps can get pricey, but the health and safety of myself and my friends is something I can afford to cover. I will also offer to drive if I am with a friend who tends to have road rage when they drive sober. It’s always a risk getting into the car of somebody with unsafe driving practices, yet if you bring up the fact that they are driving poorly, some will purposely drive worse to prove a point. Once, after I requested my friend’s boyfriend to stop texting as he drove, he started to violently shake his van to scare me, the rest of the people in the car immediately scolding him for putting us all in danger. Midway through the ride, it was casually admitted that he was under the influence of both marajuana and alcohol as if it was no big deal. I never got in a car with him again. A few months later he got into a serious car accident and totaled his new vehicle. Half a year after that, he was tried for speeding and drug possession in court. I felt extremely lucky that he didn’t get into a collision while I was riding with him, and ever since then, I have been extremely selective in who I let drive me around.

Bad, reckless drivers are going to stay bad, even after they get into accidents. Creating a reliable network of friends who you know drive safely can help combat the issue of others putting your life at risk. Learning to deal with these reckless drivers on the road is also an invaluable skill, as you can only protect yourself when others are driving unsafely around you. Don’t let other drivers intimidate you into speeding, using your phone on the road, or driving while intoxicated or tired. Having a license entails more than just being on the road itself. It gives you the right to nearly unlimited freedoms, as you can travel wherever you’d like, but it’s a freedom available to many, and a large number of people actively abuse it. Safe driving is always worth the extra few minutes that may be added onto a trip, and if you feel as if you can’t drive properly, don’t get behind the wheel. The road will be there when you’re ready but you may lose your life if you aren’t.