Brick Wall Moments

Everyone has those moments in life, what my mom calls “brick wall moments”, that define the next path or stage in one’s future. Sometimes they are small walls and other times the are monstrous. She always talks about the ability to climb over those walls, that it’ll be much easier the smaller they are. Although I haven’t yet had what I believe is a “brick wall moment” as of yet, a family friend has had one that will affect his life for a long time to come.

About two years ago, while traveling home from a family trip, my mom’s cell phone rang. As she looked at the caller ID on her phone, she seemed a bit surprised to be getting a call from a family friend as this was not someone we see or talk to on a regular basis. When she answered the phone, she was shocked to learn that he was calling to talk about his car accident from the night before. He explained that a deer jumped out in front of him, causing him to swerve and lose control of his car. The car rolled and landed in a field, ejecting him and his passenger from the car. Our friend walked away with only minor wounds, but his passenger suffered significant injuries. It wasn’t until the story was posted in our local newspaper that we learned the details of the accident.

The story in the newspaper reported that our friend had left a local bar very early in the morning. Although he had not been drinking and was found to be sober, he still made very poor decisions that led to the accident. Driving a 2014 Ford Mustang, it was estimated that he was traveling approximately 125 mph in a 45 mph residential zone. When the deer caused him to swerve, he crossed through the oncoming lane, hit the guardrail, a sign, then the car rolled several times. Neither of them was wearing a seatbelt. Both were transported to a local trauma center, one by ambulance and one by air. Our friend was treated and released, suffering cuts, bruises, and almost loosing part of a finger. Unfortunately, his passenger wasn’t so lucky. He survived, but spent over a month in the hospital and underwent many surgeries. Suffering major injuries in the accident and many setbacks during his recovery, the passenger will never fully recover from this accident.

Our friend has been charged with a felony count of aggravated assault and other traffic violations. He has been to court several times and is still dealing with the legal ramifications of his decisions. Personally, he lost his job over this situation and also compromised his commercial driver license which will prevent him from getting similar jobs in the future. The repercussions of this will be associated with him for a long time to come. He may even spend time in prison. Although he doesn’t talk about the accident much now, he did have a long conversation with my mom shortly after the accident and defines the accident as an enormous “brick wall moment” that will be difficult to get over. What if there had been oncoming traffic in the other lane? What if his passenger had died? What if he had died? Was driving so recklessly worth it? Why would anyone want to increase their risk of hurting themselves, or others, by driving destructively with a speeding, several thousand-pound projectile? It has taught him very valuable life lessons.

Earlier this year, I passed my driver’s license exam, as did many of my friends. As a newly licensed driver, I undoubtedly realize that the importance of using safe driving behaviors on the road. Even before our friend’s accident, I would’ve never made such a careless decision behind the wheel of a car, but it doesn’t take such horrific actions to have a life changing accident. I have heard so many stories from classmates about driving dangerously and having minor car accidents. I have even had a close call myself when a deer jumped out in front of me when I was driving home from work. Undoubtedly, once a person has their own “brick wall moment,” it will have a life changing effect on them. The questions are: will it be one they can easily overcome or one that will alter their life forever?